Of Farewells, Frogs & Fears…….a fffffffffreaking oddish evening

January 22, 2009 at 9:12 pm | Posted in Friends, Life, Oddness | 2 Comments

Farewells

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Our @hwakelam is running off to Melbourne with her family in tow. A big adventure for the Wakelams.  We had farewell drinks last night in East Perth. Met lots of new peeps, some of whom I have “known” on Twitter for a while. It’s always weird and nice to meet the real peeps behind the tweets.

Harry and I WILL be doing a rematch in Melbourne on my next visit for our

“I-can-drink-you-under-the-table-with-beer-and-not-drinking-water-or-eating-coz-thats -cheating-last-woman-standing-wins-challenge”

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Good luck Harry – gonna miss the grizzles and gossiping over lunch and daiquiris!

Frogs

I got home from dropping off Harriet and there was a frog at my front door.

A large one.

Made of plastic.

And….its really kind of well, ugly.

From my 80 year old neighbour from a verge-side collection for my garden :(. I named him Sid after the neighbour… wondering if I can hide it deep in the garden where it will get overgrown? Ugh how the hell do I get out of THIS?

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Fears

There is not much that really phases me in life, in terms of the normal kinds of things that others are phobic about.

  • I have swum with Great White Sharks on 3 occasions that I am know about and once was with no cage (it wasn’t actually intentional let me assure you).
  • I have worked in the muddy, monsoonal rivers off Cairns and far North Queensland.  When I say worked in, I mean literally – up to my armpits…….with BIG saltwater crocs.
  • Redback in my knickers the other week. I have removed huntsmen spiders off my giant mate who is a hard core trucker with the beard and everything. He was screaming like a baby. Pfft.
  • In my last place of employment I had to catch and kill a mouse because the entire office was screaming and (i am not joking here) standing on tables and chairs…..and there were about 15 people in that office…..only 3 of which were women…I got my “Lara Croft” nickname that day.

Spiders, rats, mice, snakes, lizards, sharks, crocs……..not a problem.

2 things I don’t do…..EVER:

1) heights

2) cockroaches

The only dissection in my entire university career I never was able to complete was the cockroach.

I almost froth at the mouth with panic just thinking about them.

My traditional methods of killing roaches are thus:

a) using half a can of insect killer….literally…I spray them until they are about 3 inches high in foam.

b) a yellow pages from a great height – gravity, mass & acceleration ARE your friends!

c) get someone else to do it

Disposal of the corpse……….is always done by someone else. I remember one sat dead on the floor bang in the middle of the lounge, under a yellow pages for 2 weeks once. Ugh

A cockroach once bit me on the webbing of my foot between my big toe and my second toe. It was in my ugg boot when I was camping. Never knew they bite. Let me just say – it hurt like a freaking dog for a week! It felt like my foot was on fire the entire time!

So…the point of all this roach stuff?

I got home last night from Harriets farewell to Perth drinks……..guess what I saw in the spare room (this set of villas drives me nuts. If one person has a roach prob, we ALL get them. Shits me to tears really)?

A roach the size of a miniature freaking miniature pony!

I ran screaming (not something I am in the habit of) from the room and hid in the bathroom shaking for about 15 mins.

Given the spare room is a bit smallish and the spare bed fills most of the space, any attempt to find and inflict a roach exorcism was nigh on impossible, not to mention the inevitable foaming mouth.

God bless late night servos. 

Roach baits. I bought 2 boxes and threw the baits in the room and slammed the door shut with a towel on the floor against the crack.  I might go in there in a week and see if it’s dead yet.

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2 Comments »

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  1. I’ve got one for ya Luthy. Two days ago we were packing up our old 1920s apartment on the 4th floor. We had a large window that looked out to a central patio that all these old South American buildings seem to have. They must have sprayed downstairs because the next thing you know there were several hundred cockroaches flying up the walls, windows and pipes.

    Screaming ensued on a level rarely experienced.

  2. OH MY FARRRRKING GOD.

    i feel……….nauseous.

    i would have died…literally…. i think my heart would have exploded in my chest Apone! zomg!

    either that or I would be in a lunatic asylum somewhere a dribbling mess.

    OMG thats….seriously like my worse nightmare


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